First dates suck. Everything about going on a first date is just awkward. If you don’t know the person well enough, it throws off the entire experience. I like getting to know guys, whether through school or text before I start going out with them. I feel like that’s a pretty reasonable preference, but hey, that’s just my opinion.
I think first dates are so painfully awkward because of the small talk. “What’s your favorite color? What movies have you seen recently?” There’s nothing new to it. I feel like it’s more interesting and makes the first date better when you at least know a little something about who you’re going out with. If I know nothing about a guy, but I choose to go out with him, then I don’t know who I’m going out with. In my mind, I’m on a date with this really sweet guy; but all I can tell you about him is his name, and maybe the minor fact he mentioned about himself in the two-sentence conversation we had. Other than that, this guy is a complete stranger to me.
This could be a personal thing, but I feel it’s more exciting to go out with somebody that you know at least something about. I was recently at a football game with this guy. He and I had started talking over Snapchat (which probably isn’t the best idea to begin with). While he and I were Snapping, he was very eager for us to go out before starting to get to know each other. I can see how that’s a big thing for a lot of people, but I didn’t know anything about this guy. I was hesitant to go out with him. We realized that we were going to the same football game and decided to meet up there. At this time, all I could tell you about this guy is that he liked the Hunger Games.
Obviously, at first, he seemed nice and we were just doing this whole small talk thing. “Do you like football? Do you come to these games often?” As the night went on, I learned a lot more about him than I expected–or wanted–to learn. I found out that he was on an Esports team at his school and that he played in the Orchestra, which was not something I knew before our date. Soon he started talking about his friends, though, and that’s when I really got the ick. I appreciate everybody having different friends and interests, but some of the things he was talking about were rude and insensitive, especially for a first date.
That night, I found out that I was not a big fan of who he was surrounding himself with, or the version of himself he was putting forward. Not only was he showing me this side of him the first time we met, but my friends were also there with me. As you can imagine, it didn’t work out. He was nice, but a little too weird for my taste. That interesting night taught me that I don’t like first dates.
It’s something I’ve believed for a while, but if I’m going to go on a first date with somebody, I would prefer that I know their interests before going on the date. Although I understand the idea of getting to know somebody on the first date, what if I want to know more than how old you are and what school you go to before putting myself in public with you, alone? Luckily I had my friends this time, but what if I hadn’t? I don’t know how that date might have ended.
I believe in the idea of becoming friends with someone before going out. At least then I know a little bit about you, and the conversation isn’t limited to “What’s your favorite color?” and nothing else. If I know somebody’s interests, likes, and dislikes, I can have a more complex and maybe even emotional connection with this person before going out on an actual date with them.
If you want to go on a date to meet someone for the first time, then that’s your prerogative. However, I would love it if a guy wanted to get to know me, and at least know something about me, before going out in public. You can never truly know who somebody is behind the screen.
